Puppets Praising Christ - First Baptist Church, Troy, Al

Stories, Quips, Phrases, and Quotes

These are various literary examples of how the word of God can be found in many different ways from various sources. Some are amusing, some are touching, and some are downright funny!

Emergency Numbers
 
When in sorrow..................................John 14
When you have sinned........................Psalm 57
When you worry.................................Math 6:19-34
When you are in danger......................Psalm 91
When your faith needs stirring.............Heb 11
When you feel down and out ..............Rom 8:31
When you want peace and rest............Math 11:25-30
When the world seems bigger
than God..........................................Psalm 90
If your pocketbook is empty.................Psalm 37
When you are lonely and fearful...........Psalm 23
When you grow bitter and critical.........I Cor 13
For how to get along with
fellow man.......................................Rom 12
If you get depressed.........................Psalm 27
If people seem unkind......................John 15

************DID GOD CREATE EVIL ***********

At a certain college there was a professor with a reputation for being tough on Christians. At the first class, every semester, he asked if anyone was a Christian and proceeded to degrade them and to mock their statement of faith. One semester, he asked the question and a young man raised his hand. The professor asked, "Did God make everything young man?" He replied "Yes sir he did!"
The professor responded, "If God made everything, then he made evil." The student didn't have a response and the professor was happy to once again proved the Christian faith to be a myth. Then another man raised his hand and asked, "May I ask you something,sir?" "Yes, you may," responded the professor.The young man stood up and said, "Sir, is there such a thing as cold?" "Of course there is, what kind of a question is that? Haven't you ever been cold?" The young man replied, "Actually, sir, cold doesn't exist. What we consider to be cold, is really an absence of heat. Absolute zero is when there is absolutely no heat, but cold does not really exist. We have only created that term to describe how we feel when heat is not there."
The young man continued, Sir, is there such a thing as dark?" Once again the professor responded, "Of course there is." And once again,the student replied, "Actually, sir, darkness does not exist. Darkness is really only the absence of light. Darkness is only a term developed to describe what happens when there is no light present." Finally, the young man asked, "Sir, is there such a thing as evil?"
The professor responded, "Of course, we have rapes, murders and violence everywhere in the world, Those thing are evil." The student replied, "Actually, sir, evil does not exist. Evil is simply the absence of God. Evil is a term developed to describe the absence of God. God did not create evil".
It isn't like truth, or love which exist as virtues like heat or light. Evil is simply the state where God is not present, like cold without heat, or darkness without light."
The professor had nothing to say.................

Be full of Christ today, there is no room for anything else . .

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***************************TIMMY****************************

Timmy was a little five year old boy whose Mom loved him very much, and being a worrier, she was concerned about him walking to school when he started Kindergarten. She walked him to school the first couple of days,and at the end of the week, he came home from school and told his mother that he did not want her walking him to school everyday. He wanted to be like the "big boys" he protested loudly.So she had an idea of how to handle it.She asked a neighbor, Mrs. Goodnest, if she would please follow him to school in the mornings, staying at a distance, so he probably wouldn't notice her.Mrs. Goodnest said that since she was up early with her toddler anyway, it would be a good way for them to get some exercise as well, so she agreed.The next school day, Mrs. Goodnest and her little girl, Marcy, set out following behind Timmy as he walked to school with another neighbor boy he knew. She did this for the whole week. As the boys walked and chatted, kicking stones and twigs,Timmy's little friend noticed the same lady was following them as she seemed to do every day all week. Finally he said to Timmy, "Have you noticed that lady following us to school all week? Do you know her?" Timmy nonchalantly replied, "Yeah, I know who she is.The friend said, "Well, who is she?" "That's just Shirley Goodnest" Timmy replied,"and her daughter Marcy." "Shirley Goodnest? Who the heck is she and why is she following us?" "Well", Timmy explained, "every night my Mom makes me say the 23rd Psalm with my prayers, 'cuz she worries about me so much.And in the psalm, it says 'Shirley Goodnest and Marcy shall follow me all the days of my life,' so I guess I'll just have to get used to it!"

************************Where is God?*************************

A couple had two little boys, ages 8 and 10, who were excessively mischievous. The two were always getting into trouble and their parents could be assured that if any mischief occurred in their town their two young sons were in some way involved. The parents were at their wits end as to what to do about their sons' behavior.

The mother had heard that a clergyman in town had been successful in disciplining children in the past, so she asked her husband if he thought they should send the boys to speak with the clergyman. The husband said, "We might as well. We need to do something before I really lose my temper!"

The clergyman agreed to speak with the boys, but asked to see them individually. The 8-year-old went to meet with him first. The clergyman sat the boy down and asked him sternly, "Where is God?"

The boy made no response, so the clergyman repeated the question in an even sterner tone, "Where is God?" Again the boy made no attempt to answer, so the clergyman raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy's face, "WHERE IS GOD?"

At that the boy bolted from the room and ran directly home slamming himself in his closet.

His older brother followed him into the closet and said, "What happened?" The younger brother replied, "We are in BIG trouble this time. God is missing and they think we did it!"

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